I was listening to one of Gary Vee’s podcasts on caring what other people think, and what he said really struck me.
“So many people make big life decisions based on other people’s opinions. You care so much about what your mom, dad, brother, or friends think that you’re allowing them to dictate your actions in life.
At the core of it, the barriers so many people have aren’t really about “money” or “time.” They’re about opinions.
It’s the biggest reason so many people are unhappy right now. Because they value someone else’s opinion more than their own.
Once you get past that, life can get real good.”
Can you relate?
I can too. I am totally a people pleaser. I never want people to think ill of me, and if I am ever in an awkward situation, I have thought about it for days on end, replaying it in my mind. Before, I also didn’t always wear what I thought I ‘shouldn’t’ be wearing out of fear of being judged. Side note: I still struggle with this!
But let me tell you, it’s a huge WASTE OF TIME.
I have built my confidence over lots and lots of time, and I am always a work in progress, however over the last several months in particular, I have been working on giving no fucks.
Most people are really not paying attention to your every move, those awkward things you might have said or done etc. Most people are actually worried about how they are coming across, they don’t care what you’re wearing, what color your hair is, or something you said that you felt was weird or awkward.
This brings me to the fact that IF people do judge you, it is about their own perception.
Back to Gary See, because he just hits the nail on the head with this.
“So they tell Ricky to go to Princeton because they want to brag about it — not because it’s the best move for their kid.
And it goes broader than just parents.
The truth is, no one has 100% context on your life outside of you. The reason I don’t value my wife’s or my mom’s opinion more than my own is because they don’t know 100% of everything.”
So, go out and be bold. Own your unique self, make decisions for YOU. Maybe you have been wanting to color your hair pink – do it. Maybe you want to wear a fun fringe mini skirt to that party you have coming up – do it. Maybe you want a new career, but everyone is nay-saying it. Do it!
I have asked a few older people about their life, my Grandma in particular, and she has a regret: she wanted to go to medical school, but that wasn’t a career for women at the time, so she did not go. It’s a regret. And a lot of older people will tell you that they have regrets.
Don’t let your life be dictated by others’ opinions.
See what happens when you live your life the way that you want to and give no fucks. Maybe people will respond to your choices, but those responses should not have any power over you.
So go out and give no fucks, and see your world open up!